Injuries

Ouch. My friend L''s husband is facing some harsh abuse from one of their twins:

This [dumb parenting injury] occurred last night as I (foolishly!) bent down to kiss the top of M.'s head as she bounced around in bed like a bucking bronco. Her head (which, it should be noted, is extremely hard) connected with my chin. Fortunately, my tongue was spared. But my lower lip got fat, black, and blue in a hurry.

Poor Mr. Feral. Now it looks like he beats me. Some of the other parents even eyed us warily as we dropped off the kids at daycare.

I knew that parenthood was a dangerous sport. My cesarian scar aches before storms. My back is perpetually killing me. My ears ring from the screams. I've gone up at least one tampon size. My belly is the object of derision, delight, and endless poking. But this (which the exception of the abdominal surgery) is definitely worst parenting injury so far.

At least I don't get kicked in the balls every other day, like Mr. Feral.

I've been wracking my brain trying to remember whether A. has caused me any bodily harm in the past year or so. Before that, there was so little that she was physically capable of pulling off. I did, however, recently fracture a bone in my hand while stupidly punching a door in a bout of frustration over my daughter's refusal to actually go to sleep one night.

The physical distress from that, however, was less extreme than the emotional. Turns out she was experiencing her first severe fears of the dark. Also, she was thinking about an old Sesame Street skit in which a giant set of teeth destroyed a desk. Her fear of darkness and giant teeth was so profound that she couldn't even articulate it to her parents.

What a dope I am.

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Injuries

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